Losing focus

This is something that happens to me regularly, and I find it really affects everything else. My sense of worth, motivation and mood. My mental wellbeing is at a low as I struggle to find just that little spark to do something, anything. There are days when I go to bed, trying really hard to look back and find anything positive about the day and down when I can’t. I feel like a failure. And its very difficult to then pick myself up from this, often a whole week will go by in this mood, feeling like time has been very much wasted. And I know its something only I can change, but its also a very hard cycle to try and get out of, particularly when it seems to be continuous. I feel like a lot of mine stems from being unhappy and bored at work, totally uninterested in my current role. There is no personal motivation to do anything and that then impacts on other aspects of my day, such as writing, getting jobs done at home or even sticking to my personal goals. But I can’t blame everything on one thing either. In truth, I am my own worst enemy. I lose focus, get distracted and sometimes just ending staring into space. The result being that I feel useless and like a coiled-up spring of frustration.  Where am I going, what am I doing, where is it all heading? I’m just coasting along with no answers. The trouble is that having all this ‘time’ gives me far too much space to think. And that isn’t always a good thing, as I’m constantly wondering if things could be better if I just changed parts of my life. I’m trying very hard to have less of these days, and I’m achieving it slowly by working on some of my own things. It may not be the right way, but it’s the only way I can build myself back up. And on some days, it seems to be working. I find something that I can concentrate on, that I’m interested in and then time passes much more easily as I become involved. I reach the end of the day with a positive sense of self and achievement, my spirit somewhat lifted and I feel I can go out and do more, even just for a few days, but it’s a start. And if you find just that small spark of focus, grab hold of it with both hands, trust me, it can make a world of difference to how you feel.